I'm your pal. I mean, he's been club champion for three years running and I'm no slouch myself. The only reason I'm here is because I might buy it! It's easy to grin / When your ship comes in / And you've got the stock market beat. This unknown … I want potato salad... Judge Smails: You'll get nothing, and like it! You're drinking too much, Your Excellency. You're a bishop, for God's sake! This is fine leather! Judge Smails: Wrong, you're drinking too much your Excellency. Well, just ask my grandson, Spaulding. Al Czervik: (Picks up hat) Oh, this is the worst-looking hat I ever saw. Caddyshack II Trying to tee off. Classic line from Judge Smails to Spaulding from Caddyshack (1980) ... Judge Smails: It’s easy to grin when your ship comes in and you’ve got the stock market beat. Judge Smails: Gambling is illegal at Bushwood sir, and I never slice. I'll shoot you 18 holes for ten thousand bucks! But the man worthwhile is the man who can smile, when his shorts are too tight in the seat. Dr. Beeper : Must be a nice change from dreary old Manhattan. Al Czervik: OK, you can owe me. Would you come with me, please? November 2020. I don't play golf... for money... against people. Judge Smails It's easy to grin When your ship comes in And you've got the stock market beat. The best movie quotes, movie lines and film phrases by Movie Quotes .com . Ted Knight delivers a top notch performance as Judge Elihu Smails in the quintessential golf comedy CADDYSHACK. Judge Smails: Listen, your father and I prepped together, went to war together, played golf together. At an exclusive country club, an ambitious young caddy, Danny Noonan, eagerly pursues a caddy scholarship in hopes of attending college and, in turn, avoiding a job at the lumber yard. Judge Smails: It's easy to grin / When your ship comes in / And you've got the stock market beat. Caddyshack quotes: the most famous and inspiring quotes from Caddyshack. Judge Smails: Danny, I'm having a party this weekend. Directed by Harold Ramis. “Danny, there’s a lot of badness in the world. Judge Smails: Danny, I think you know why you are here, so I'll... do us both the courtesy of not reviewing what happened yesterday... [angrily shoves the lamp to the side, but calms down]. by LuckyTiger. And I say, “Hey, Dalai Lama, hey, how about a little something,… 1. Judge Smails: Spaulding, how many times have I spoken to you about your language? Rate this quote: (4.17 / 52 votes) “. In order to succeed, he must first win the favour of the elitist Judge Smails, and then the caddy golf tournament which Smails sponsors. My niece is the kind of girl that has a … :"It's easy to grin / When your ship comes in / And you've got the stock market beat. I think you know why you're here. Judge Smails Quotes: Judge Smails: You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. He's currently being heckled. Judge Smails: Danny, Danny, there's a lot of, uh, well, badness in the world today. Judge Smails: Do you mind, sir. 1980, Caddyshack quotes. Good, very good. I want that wax stripped off! Al Czervik: A member? admin October 3, 2014 0 Comments. I felt I owed it to them. Spaulding, get your foot off the boat. ln private? Judge Smails: I … I'm Danny Noonan. Judge Smails quotes. Judge Smails : Oh Dr. Beeper, Bishop Pickering this is my niece Lacey Underall. Look at the wax build-up on those shoes! A hundred bucks! I know how hard it is for young people today and I wanna help. Didn't want to do it - felt I owed it to them. Judge Smails: You - you will never be a member of Bushwood! Judge Smails: Czervik Construction Company? Judge Smails: Spalding get your foot off the boat! I could beat you with one arm! Al Czervik: OK, you can owe me. / But the man worthwhile, / Is the man who can smile, / When his shorts are too tight in the seat. Judge Smails: How would you like to come over and mow my lawn? Judge Smails: Good. We're waiting. So I'll do us the courtesy of not reviewing what happened yesterday. Oh, Porterhouse! This is fine leather. 29,824 Views. Shop judge smails masks created by independent artists from around the globe. No, cheeseburger. Danny Noonan: I know I make some bad mistakes in the past. Article by Liz Errico. Judge Smails: Then how do you measure yourself with other golfers? Judge Smails: Gambling is illegal at Bushwood sir, and I never slice. 1. / But the man worthwhile, / Is the man who can smile, / When his shorts are too tight in the seat"... Ah ha ha ha. Bishop: You never ask a navy man if he'll have another drink, because it's nobody's goddamned business how much he's had already. Judge Smails: You're playing golf and you're going to like it. [slices ball into woods] Judge Smails: *Damn*. TV Show Quotes. Caddyshack quotes. Caddyshack. ... - Judge Elihu Smails: You're not a man, you're a bishop, for God's sakes. Submitted by acronimous on December 31, 2009. Smoke Porterhouse: Yes SIR! Look at the wax build-up on those shoes! With Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Bill Murray, Ted Knight. Tags: 80s-movie-funny, caddyshack-lovers, caddyshack-1980-movie, bushwood-cc, bushwood-country-club ... caddyshack-quote, caddyshack-quotes, so-ive-got-that-going-for-me, bill-murray, carl-spackler Judge Smails : I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. This is a biggie! Al Czervik: The last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it. Sit down, Danny. I'm trying to tee off. Hooks. Judge Smails From Caddyshack Posted. Chop chop! Are you my pal, Mr. scholarship winner? I'm willing to make up for that. Judge Smails: [to Bishop Fred Pickering] Say, Fred, did you hear the one about the Jew, the Catholic, and the colored boy who went to heaven? He's got … We built this club, he and I. Explore Hire Jim Essian's photos on Flickr. Good, good. Quotes. The scene where Al Czervik hits Judge Smails in the private parts with a struck golf ball happened to Ramis on what he said was the second of his two rounds of golf, on a nine-gap open course. Well I'll tell you what's satisfying: *cash*. [the judge hits the ball, and it goes flying into some trees, in response, he shouts in frustration]. Danny, I'm having a party this weekend. [impatiently waits for the final putt] Well? All orders are custom made and most ship worldwide within 24 hours. The last thing any of us need right now is a lot of loose talk about her behavior. Youy best source for Caddyshack T-Shirts and Gifts. Bishop: Excellency, fiddlesticks, my name's Fred and I'm a man, same as you. Funny Quotes from the 80's Movie and your favorite characters like, Carl Spackler, Al Czervik, Judge Smails, Ty Webb, and more. I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn’t want to do it, felt I owed it to them.”. Judge Smails: Wrong! Article from flickr.com. Carl Spackler: Cinderella story. The judge would like to see the caddy Danny Noonan as soon as he comes in. Danny Noonan: I planned to go to law school after I graduated, but it looks like my folks won't have enough money to put me through college. Danny Noonan: I swear, I didn't tell anybody anything, sir. Judge Smails: Oh Dr. Beeper, Bishop Pickering this is my niece Lacey Underall.Lacey's mother sent her to us for the summer. Forty thousand dollars...Billy. Didn't want to do it. Oh, Billy, Billy, Billy. You can have Dr. Frankenputz... Dr. Beeper: [mortified] I beg your pardon! Bishop: There is no God! What, when you buy a hat like this I bet you get a free bowl of soup, huh? I think they're tunneling in from that construction site over yonder. I want a hot dog. I'm trying to tee off. User area. Judge Smails: Mind Sir? Chop chop. Spalding Smails : No I'm not grandpa I'm playing tennis. Dec 13, 2011 - Judge Smails is angry after a lousy tee off. Judge Smails: [chuckles] How 'bout a Fresca? Spalding Smails: No I'm not grandpa I'm playing tennis. A gopher. Spalding Smails: Sorry grandpa I forgot. Hire Jim Essian has uploaded 1335 photos to Flickr. I think you can still become a gentleman some day if you understand and abide by the rules of decent society. Judge Smails : You're playing golf and you're going to like it. Judge Smails: Do you mind, sir. Follow us on. Didn't wanna do it, but felt I owed it to them. / But the man worthwhile, / Is the man who can smile, / When his shorts are too tight in the seat. He's currently being heckled. Al Czervik: I'll bet you a hundred bucks you slice it into the woods. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. What a great character. I see it in court today. There’s a force in the universe that makes things happen. Judge Smails: Look at the wax build up on those shoes. The last time I saw a … Saved from moviefanatic.com. Explore. Judge Smails: Okay, Pookie. "So I Got That Going for Me, Which Is Nice." Judge Smails: McFiddish, do you know what I just saw? Do the honors. [turns around in his chair, slightly hitting his desk; Both Danny and Smails tries to see their faces]. Spalding Smails: Turds. I have a little poem I'd like to read in honor of this occasion, if I may. Got 'em, Judge. November 2020. I mean, he's been club champion for three years... Spalding Smails: I want a hamburger. I'm trying to tee off. Outta nowhere. Judge Smails: I owe you nothing. My name is Fred and I'm just a man, same as you are. Al Czervik: I'll bet you a hundred bucks you slice it into the woods. Judge Smails: You're not a man, you're a bishop, for God's sakes. Judge Smails: Do you mind, sir. An exclusive golf course has to deal with a brash new member and a destructive dancing gopher. 1 Al Czervik: Oh, this is the worst-looking hat I ever saw. 46 0. Al Czervik: ...I bet ya slice into the woods! Judge Smails: Oh Dr. Beeper, Bishop Pickering this is my niece Lacey Underall. I want that wax stripped off there, then I want them creamed and buffed with a fine chamois. Quotes By Genres. Judge Smails: Gambling is illegal at Bushwood sir, and I never slice. 2. [Danny walks inside Judge Smails' office, where Smails is seated around, and has a seat, awaiting his disciplinary action for his involvement with Lacey]. I’ve sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Judge Smails is angry after a lousy tee off. Let's not... cave in too easy. Lacey's mother sent her to us for the summer. But the man worthwhile, Is the man who can smile, When his shorts are too tight in the seat. “I’m going to give you a little advice. My niece is the kind of girl who has a certain... zest of living. ... . Al Czervik: Well, how about teams then, for twenty thousand? Goodness... or badness? Judge Smails: You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. I want them creamed and buffed with a fine chamois. Yes sir. And I want them now! Judge Smails: You're not a man. Dr. Beeper: Must be a nice change from dreary old Manhattan. High quality Judge Smails gifts and merchandise. What do you say, Ty? I want a hot dog. Judge Smails : Spaulding, get dressed you're playing golf. You think I actually want to join this scumatorium? Browse more character quotes from Caddyshack (1980), Judge Smails is preparing to hit the ball on the first tee while Al Czervick watches, Smails looks over at Czervick, who is watching anxiously, the judge hits the ball, and it goes flying into some trees, in response, he shouts in frustration, Ty has just been asked by Al to partner up against Judge Smails in a $20,000-per-person golf match, Danny walks inside Judge Smails' office, where Smails is seated around, and has a seat, awaiting his disciplinary action for his involvement with Lacey, turns around in his chair, slightly hitting his desk; Both Danny and Smails tries to see their faces, angrily shoves the lamp to the side, but calms down. Spaulding, this one calls for the old Billy Barule. And I want them now! I see it in court everyday. Caddyshack is the pinnacle sports comedy film. Judge Smails. Explore Hire Jim Essian's photos on Flickr. Judge Smails: Can I have a word with you? Inspired designs on t-shirts, posters, stickers, home decor, and more by independent artists and designers from around the world. Al Czervik: I'll bet you a hundred bucks you slice it into the woods. Lacey's mother sent her to us for the summer. Lacey's mother sent her to us for the summer. Don't let me down, Billy! Judge Smails: [not realizing Danny's already seated] Sit down, Danny. I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Tony D'Annunzio: Another Rob Roy, Bishop? on 10/20/20 at 12:41 am. What, when you buy a hat like this I bet you get a free bowl of soup, huh? 6. Caddyshack Movie Quotes . Well, I slap an injunction on them so fast it'll make their head spin. OK Pookie, do the honors. I want a milkshake. Quotes By Genres. [Smails looks over at Czervick, who is watching anxiously]. Judge Smails: Well, the world needs ditch diggers, too. Toggle navigation. Collection Edit. I have a little poem I'd like to read in honor of this occasion, if I may. No, cheeseburger. [Judge Smails is preparing to hit the ball on the first tee while Al Czervick watches]. Judge Smails: *Damn*. ... Judge Smails: *Damn*. In this scene, groundskeeper Carl Spackler (Bill Murray) … Judge Smails, sir? Carl: What an incredible Cinderella story. Danny Noonan: [shakes Smails' hand] Yes, sir. I wanna be good. Judge Smails: [relief sigh] Good. I want that wax stripped off! View Quote. Chop chop! Ty Webb: [to a glaring Smails] You know, Judge, my dad... never liked you. Al Czervik: [mocking] You demand satisfaction? 28. Check out the best of Caddyshack quotes. Judge Smails: I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. "So we finish the eighteenth and he’s gonna stiff me. Judge Smails: Spaulding, get dressed you're playing golf. We have dug up these Caddyshack quotes from the depths of the internet and brought together best of these sayings in a single article. This is fine leather! He and I are regular pals. Judge Smails. Class movie quotes. I want a milkshake. Lacey Underall: Yes I was really getting tired of having fun all the time. Judge Smails: You'll get nothing and like it! Yes sir, Judge. Al Czervik: ...let's go while we're young! The Cinderella Story. Scandal TV Show Quotes .. Judge Smails: Ty, what did you shoot today? [Ty has just been asked by Al to partner up against Judge Smails in a $20,000-per-person golf match]. I felt I owed it to them. Do you know what gophers can do to a golf course? Bishop: "Excellency," fiddlesticks! October 2020. Carl Spackler: "Tears in his eyes, I guess, as he lines up this last shot. Didn't want to do it. Judge Smails: Spaulding, how many times have I spoken to you about your language? Article from flickr.com. Register / Log in. And I want them now. Al Czervik: Hey 'Whitey,' where's your hat? Judge Smails: Don't you people have jobs? Judge Smails: Don't you people have homes? I want them creamed and buffed with a fine chamois. Ty Webb: Don't sell yourself short Judge, you're a tremendous slouch. Al Czervik: What're we, waiting for these guys? We bring you the best quotes from Caddyshack movie. Judge Smails: Do you stand for *goodness*, or - for *badness*? Judge Smails. [pauses a beat] How would you like to come over and mow my lawn? Spalding Smails: I want a hamburger. Oh, Porterhouse! The most important decision you can make right now is what do you stand for, Danny? Caddyshack is a 1980 American sports comedy film directed by Harold Ramis, written by Brian Doyle-Murray, Ramis, and Douglas Kenney, and starring Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, Ted Knight, Michael O'Keefe, and Bill Murray.Doyle-Murray also has a supporting role. Smoke Porterhouse: You got it. Judge Smails: Sorry. Hey Whitey, where's your hat? Dr. Beeper: Must be a nice change from dreary old Manhattan. And … Caddyshack Quotes Judge Smails Quotes I Never Slice Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes Bob Marley Quotes Bruce Lee Quotes Buddha Quotes Confucius Quotes John F. Kennedy Quotes John Lennon Quotes Mahatma Gandhi Quotes Movie Quotes .. Caddyshack quotes 1. We quote it without even realizing it at this point. And let's face it, some people simply do not *belong*. Spaulding, get your foot off the boat! Groundskeeper Sandy: Aye, Sir.